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The Family
Even though
we know that the Scriptures contain everything we need for
life and godliness, sometimes they seem to present only a
riddle. Where do we find the key? The Scriptures
themselves always offer us a key to that riddle, so that even
the simplest can understand. The readings for the Sunday After
Christmas are a case in point: Psalm 128, Genesis 1:26-31,
Colossians 3:12-21, and Matthew 2:13-22 At first it seems
difficult to join them all together under the theme of “The
Family,” but the key is found Ephesians 3:14,15. “For
this cause I bow my knees unto the Father of our Lord Jesus
Christ, Of whom the whole family in heaven and earth is
named” In fact, this is the key to understanding both
today’s readings and “The Family.” “The Father” here is
God, the Triune God, the Father and Creator of all
mankind. “Of whom the whole family in heaven and earth
is named” means not only “named” but also “imaged.” God
is the original of all fathers. He contains within
himself all “father-ness,” and whatever appears in our world
under the name “father” derives from this original. But
think also about how we name things. If Junior looks
like his father Tommy, we are bound to name him “little
Tommy.” We call men “fathers” in some way because they
reflect our Father in heaven. “Of whom” here refers not only to
God the Father, first person in the Trinity, but also to God
the Son, second person in the Trinity. In the preceding
verses Paul has been explaining the mystery of the Gospel,
that Christ has opened up the salvation of God beyond the Jews
to all the Gentiles, and here he refers back to him and to the
Father he has just mentioned. So this “of whom” refers
to God the Father and God the Son, and of course, the Holy
Spirit is wherever the Father and Son are. In short, Paul explains to us that only
in God himself, -- his nature and being and character --can we
find the form and meaning of the family.
CREATED IN THE
IMAGE OF GOD
As God
created man to bear his image individually, so he created the
family to bear his image collectively. But first, what do
these words mean, “image” and “likeness? None of us is
gross enough to believe that God has two arms and two legs,
and so created us in his “likeness” with the same number of
limbs. No, “God is a spirit and hath not a body like
men,” although the physical certainly does represent and
reflect something about God. After all, he chose
it. He could have chosen to make men as gigantic
single-celled animals, reproducing by fission like amoebae,
but he didn’t (thank God!). Because God did it, everything
means something. The image of God then lies chiefly
in man’s mind and heart. Think of this: if you had
seen Adam before the fall, he would have shone so brightly --
brighter than any angel or fiery furnace -- that you could not
have borne to look at him. That’s how strongly, how
perfectly the image of God shone in him before it was marred
and obscured by the Fall. In mind, he had perfect
intelligence. In heart, perfect uprightness. All
his senses and appetites obeyed his reason perfectly.
All the members of his body co-operated perfectly with his
mind and heart and will. So what is this “image” and
“likeness”? We can say, God created man after his own
image in wisdom, knowledge, righteousness, and holiness, for
dominion. Man reflects God’s image as in a mirror.
The image is not the thing reflected, and just so man was not
created to be God, but to be as God. Man bears God’s
image and reflects him just as the rest of his creation
reflects him, but reflects him as the highest and plainest
image of God in all creation.
MIRROR OF THE
TRINITY
Just as God
created man in his own image individually, he created the
family in his own image as well, but how? In love.
God ordained the family to bear his image in love. Logically
the family had to be composed of a number greater than one,
because love must have an object outside itself. If God
were a monism instead of a Trinity, love could not
exist.
What is this love? It includes affection, but far
surpasses mere affection. Affection embraces that desire
to be with and around someone. Affection longs and makes
you sigh, “Oh, when will my wife be home?” Affection
makes us say, “I can’t wait until Christmas comes when all my
brothers and sisters and aunts and uncles and cousins will
come!” But love in the family is more than
merely affection. This love is self-sacrificing.
It seeks its object not from selfishness, but for that
object’s own sake. It is the essence of all love, what
the Bible calls “charity” (Latin charitas, Greek agapé), the
love by which we escape ourselves. In today’s Epistle
reading (Col. 3:14) it is called “the bond of
perfectness.” This love mirrors its original, the love
that the three persons of the Trinity feel for each
other.
CREATED HALF AND
HALF
Look at
Genesis 1:27: “So God created man in his own image, in
the image of God created he him; male and female
created he them.” Note that when God had created Adam,
he was only half done. The man was not yet complete
without the woman. The proof of this is found in
Genesis 3:23, 24: “And Adam said, This is now bone of my
bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman,
because she was taken out of Man. Therefore shall a man leave
his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife:
and they shall be one flesh.” “Man” is not
complete without both the male and female halves to make up
one flesh. This is a great mystery, perhaps
the greatest in the Bible beside the grace of God. God
created man male and female that they two might be one, and
might learn to be content with each other. He created us
male and female so that we might have some inkling of the
perfect love among the Persons of the Holy
Trinity. The love that a husband feels for
his wife – both the spiritual affection and the physical
desire – mirrors the love the persons of the Trinity feel for
one another. The essence of this love is its appetency,
its seeking out and desiring the glory of its object.
And one conclusion seems very likely from this.
Precisely because mankind’s sexuality reflects the very nature
of the Holy Trinity -- the intimate love of the Father, Son,
and Holy Ghost for each other -- that God is so jealous about
sexual sin, and punishes it so stringently. Sexual sin
is a kind of blasphemy that touches the very person of the
Trinity itself.
FOR FRUITFULNESS
& DOMINION
Now
why did God create the family, man and woman, in this
way? For fruitfulness and dominion, as he
explains in verse 28: “And God blessed them, and God said unto
them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and
subdue it: and have dominion…” (where “replenish’ means not
“fill up again after it has been exhausted” but “fill up to
the very limit for the first time”). Love is not content to
seek itself. It does not gather its meat and drink and
new furniture around itself, and say, “Well, now I’ve got it
made. Now I’m going to relax and sit back and enjoy
myself” No, love must widen and multiply
its affection. Love does not divide, it
multiplies. When we have a second child, the love we
felt for the first is not halved and parceled out half to one
child and half to another. No, it multiplies and
grows greater for both children. And God created this
multiplying, fruitful love to issue ultimately in the greatest
love of all, the Lord Jesus Christ himself. God also created the
family for dominion. That means rule -- not just
any kind of rule, harsh or cruel or hasty, but loving
rule. We find a picture of that loving rule in
Colossians 3, where each member of the family cultivates
mercy, love, and forgiveness toward every other member.
Where each member mutually submits and rules, tied to those
above and below by order and love. Every member seeks
the good of the others, even above his own, and cheerfully,
with the whole heart. We see a picture of perfect
harmony between the one and the many, exactly as we see in the
Holy Trinity itself. Notice that this rule is
always bounded by love. The husband is not
commanded to make sure his wife dusts the baseboards, or wipes
off the fan blades once a week, or delivers supper at
precisely 6:00 p.m., or folds and stacks the clothes just
right. No, he is commanded to love his
wife. The primary mark of the husband’s rule is
love. He is commanded to so rule his children
that he doesn’t exasperate or discourage them, i.e., to temper
his rule always with gentleness and love.
CREATED FOR
PROTECTION
God did not
only create the family to reflect his image in love, but also
to protect its members. In fact, we can say with
perfect justice that outside the family there is no
protection. In today’s gospel the Holy Family
flees into Egypt away from King Herod’s murderous fury.
Notice that God did not hold the family in contempt, but used
it here to protect the life of his own glorious
Son. Familiarity breeds blindness.
We have heard this story so often, and the story of the
Incarnation, that we can hardly grasp its meaning any more.
Think about that Son, who had no need to come as a baby into
the middle of a family. He could have split the heavens,
come down to earth with a host of angels, and offered mankind
a choice: “Get on the boat now or miss it
forever.’ He didn’t do that. He chose
to be born as a helpless baby, into a
family. And this Flight into Egypt seems
like a mean thing here, running like a chicken. Where
were the angel hosts, who just a few days before had announced
the birth of Jesus to the shepherds? Where were the
bolts of lightning? Why didn’t God just lean down and
vaporise Herod with a single
word? No, he didn’t do that.
He chose to use these weak means -- a loving father in his
family -- to protect his Son. We ought to learn from
this example not to despise the means God appoints for our
salvation, nor to demand that he deliver us in some mighty and
glorious way that we imagine fitting. God has more than
one way to preserve his people. Here Christ himself,
under the cross of his humiliation and his flesh, allows
himself to be preserved by the actions of a mortal man.
Here again, the foolishness of the cross surpasses the wisdom
of man. Now stop and ponder that God had
from all eternity appointed the family to
protect even his only begotten Son. And if God appointed
the family for his protection, that what should it be for
us? How will we escape if we neglect so great a
salvation? Of the three great institutions of government
– the family, the church, and the state – the family is the
oldest, ordained by God from the very creation of man.
Let us learn to cherish the family even as it cherished Christ
himself.
CREATED FOR THE
FAMILY OF GOD
But we also
belong to a larger family, the whole family of God, the
Church. She, too, is appointed by God for our nurture
and protection. She is God’s appointed means for
our salvation. The church fathers said and the
Reformers agreed that ‘the church is our mother, and out of
her there is no ordinary hope of salvation.” Of course
that does not mean that it is absolutely impossible for God to
save you unless you belong as a member to some local church,
but it does mean that there is no other family of God except
the Church. It also means that we must seek the
prosperity and health of the Church by giving ourselves to
her, and taking part in her fellowship, service, instruction,
and nurture. It means that we must seek her out, and
that anyone who despises her casts doubt on his own
salvation. I know that it is popular today to
despise and ridicule the church, just as it is “smart” to
despise the family. After all, we have our new messiah,
The State, to protect us. Besides, the church is
corrupt, and full of hypocrites. Right, and what
a surprise. Christ himself told you with the parable of
the Wheat and the Tares (Matthew 13:24-40) that until the
Church is glorified in heaven she would always have hypocrites
in her midst. So modern critics have, in their acumen
and wisdom, “discovered” what Christ foretold 2000 years
ago. But the corruption and the
hypocrites change nothing. In spite of all the drunken
uncles and crazy aunts and nutty cousins and quarrelsome
brothers and sisters, the Church is still our family,
with ties closer than blood -- ties that bind us to God
himself, Father, Son, and Holy Ghost. We must learn from the
examples of Joseph and Mary and of the Baby Jesus himself, who
did not refuse the protection of the family that God had
appointed for him. We must learn from them to love and
cherish and build up our families. We must learn to see
the loving hand of God our Father in the families he has
ordained for us, both our family by blood and our family the
Church. And we must do everything in our power to make
our families shine with the very image of God, that they and
we might fulfil God’s purpose in creating
us.
ALMIGHTY
God, Who hast
given us thy only-begotten Son to take our nature upon
him, And as at
this time to be born of a pure virgin; Grant that
we being
regenerate, And
made thy children by adoption and grace, May daily be renewed by thy Holy
Spirit; Through
the same our Lord Jesus Christ, Who liveth and reigneth with thee and the
same Spirit ever, One God, world without end.
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